If you don’t know who Hatsune Miku is, don’t worry - I didn’t either, until my daughter made it her mission to educate me. Miku is a Vocaloid - a synthesized singing voice paired with a visual character, a turquoise-haired anime girl who has somehow transcended her origins as a piece of music software and become one of the most recognizable figures in modern pop culture. She has millions of fans worldwide, she tours, she sells out arenas, and she is, technically speaking, not real. My daughter has loved her for years, which meant that when Miku announced a North American tour with a date at Copps Coliseum in Hamilton, the conversation in our house was brief and one-directional.
Where to Find the Best Kobe Beef #
When we were in Japan last year, my daughter had quietly hoped we might be able to catch a Miku concert while we were there - Miku was in Sapporo during our visit, six hours away on the shinkansen, which would have meant a twelve hour round trip in the middle of a family vacation. I briefly considered it. Sapporo is one of my beers of choice, and there’s something undeniably appealing about the idea of drinking a Sapporo in Sapporo - how novel, how perfectly on brand. Unfortunately the Sapporo available in Ontario is brewed at the Sleeman factory in Guelph, which takes some of the romance out of it, and a twelve hour train ride for a Guelph beer didn’t seem worth it. For the record, I also lobbied for a side trip to Kobe specifically to eat Kobe beef, pointing at a map and making the case that we were practically on top of it. I was overruled. Later, to settle the matter, I googled “where to get the best Kobe beef?” The answer was Tokyo.
So when Hamilton came up as one of only two Canadian dates on the whole tour, within easy driving distance, the answer was obvious. I also knew immediately who would be making the trip with my daughter - my wife doesn’t like loud music, doesn’t like highway driving, and has never been to Copps. It’s TD Coliseum now, technically, but it will always be Copps.
It’s Been a While #
I’m no stranger to Copps. Marilyn Manson on the Antichrist Superstar tour in the 90s, Rob Zombie and Korn a few years later - good shows, good memories, and the established understanding that downtown Hamilton means one-way streets, perpetual construction, and a stress level that takes about forty minutes of highway driving to properly shake off. Worth it for Miku. Probably.
A few weeks before the show I looked up the official glowsticks - synchronized, colour-changing, specifically designed for Miku concerts, eighty dollars. I told my daughter absolutely not, pointed out that the website allowed you to bring your own within certain size restrictions, and privately considered a dollar store run. I am so glad I didn’t act on that. We timed our arrival to stop at the nearby mall first, partly to charge the car and partly because my daughter had spotted that EB Games was selling Miku merchandise at roughly a quarter of the venue price. Smart kid. We browsed, we saved money, and we got back to the venue at 6:45 for a 7pm door opening. When you live near the GTA, access to shows like this is something you take for granted - I spared a thought for Miku fans in Saskatchewan. There was nothing I could do for them.
I Have Never Seen This Before #
I have been to a lot of concerts. I have never seen a lineup like this. Four to five thousand people wrapped around the block in good spirits despite the cold, and every few minutes a new Miku cosplayer would walk past heading for the back of the line - triggering a ripple of recognition through the crowd, enthusiastic commentary on how rare that particular variant was, and the general consensus that all Mikus are canon and therefore all cosplays are valid. I knew what canon meant. I did not know what “all Mikus are canon” meant, and my daughter explained it to me patiently while we waited, along with the backstory of every cosplayer that walked past and how they fit into the Miku universe.
Her favourite was Cannibal Miku, which prompted a question from me that I think was reasonable given the circumstances. She explained the concept in full. I nodded along, processing, and made a quiet internal decision not to retain any of that information going forward. By the time we’d worked through the complete Miku cosplay taxonomy, it was 7:55 and the doors had been open for nearly an hour, which tells you something about how long that lineup was.
The show started at 8:00.
Thirty Seconds on YouTube #
I should have gone to YouTube before the show. Thirty seconds of any Miku concert footage and I would have understood immediately what I was walking into, but instead I walked in cold and found myself standing in an arena with over six thousand people, most of them holding glowsticks that were shifting colour in perfect unison with the music - washing the entire crowd in waves of red, green, orange, purple and white. I stood there and thought: oh. OH. I understand now. A dollar store glowstick would have been so much worse than no glowstick at all. At least I still had my dignity.
She is, Technically Speaking, Not Real #
Hatsune Miku is a hologram - a projected image on a giant screen at the front of the stage, backed by a live band who flanked her quietly on either side and absolutely worked for ninety straight minutes. The drummer in particular looked like he’d been training for this specific event his entire life, because the pace never let up for a second. Miku brought guests throughout the show - other Vocaloid characters, each one greeted with a fresh wave of screaming from the crowd. One of them breakdanced, and every new move brought the audience to a new level of hysteria. I watched all of this happening and the pragmatic part of my brain kept forming a sentence I had the good sense never to say out loud: you know these were just animated on a computer, right? I think if I’d said it, a horde of Miku fans may have swarmed me, and honestly, fair enough.
The whole production was extraordinary - not just technically, but in terms of what it meant to the people in that building. This wasn’t an audience watching a performance. This was a community having a shared experience, and the joy in that room was completely genuine and completely overwhelming. My daughter loved every second of it.
As Far as My Lawyers Are Concerned #
I’ve been to Copps a handful of times over the years, and I walked in assuming that experience translated - that I knew the venue, knew the drill, knew what to expect. What I failed to account for is that my concerts and my daughter’s concert are not the same thing, and everything I thought I knew flew right out the window the moment I saw that lineup. If I could do it again, I’d have gotten there earlier, sorted parking in advance, and gone straight to the merch booth - which opens hours before the actual doors do, a fact I discovered after the show when the lineup at the booth was three hundred people deep. I told my daughter we should skip it and just buy the merch online at home. Shipping on a poster started at forty eight dollars.
I also would have spent those thirty seconds on YouTube before deciding the glowstick wasn’t worth it.
After the show, my daughter reminded me that she had in fact asked about a glowstick before the concert and had tried to explain how important they were to the Miku experience. I have no recollection of this conversation. That is my position and I am sticking to it as far as my lawyers are concerned.
Expectations - Managed #
On the way home I mentioned, carefully, that not all concerts are quite this high energy - just to manage expectations for whatever comes next. She nodded, and then mentioned she’s also really into System of a Down, maybe she could see them next. I thought about this for a moment - the glowsticks, the synchronized crowd, the live band playing at full tilt for ninety minutes, six thousand people completely losing their minds together - and System of a Down, who operate at approximately the same energy level but with significantly more screaming. I think her expectations are going to be fine.
Her first concert was a good one. I’m glad I was there for it.